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One path seems very familiar, an extension of emotional states familiar as breathing. There, desire is ever only idealized, enervated by the luxury of never having to become. This path leads to radical discontinuity, to existential fracture. Disruption and unpredictability guide this path.

The other path is less familiar except in the place where desire finds itself depleted, immaterial. Here, uncertainty manifests within structure rather than rending what structure exists. This path, less familiar, is continuous and integrated and, comparatively, predictable.

Late last evening, the fact of the day opened in front of me. The path was familiar. Trying to comprehend the source of its recognizability, I found fear hiding in the eaves, sulking in a corner. This fear has no discoverable cause, yet it captures absolutely.

What makes me so afraid? end of article